“Do you have a role model?” My boyfriend asked.
“Other than you, no…” I said, but with some extra time and thought, I realized that I do.
Marzia Bisognin, also known as CutiePieMarzia, is a YouTube creator and blogger. Her focuses range from beauty, traveling, animation, hauls, and DIYs, as well as anything else that interests her. At 23, she has over 6 million subscribers on YouTube, owns her own fashion line, has written and published a novel, created her own subscription box, and traveled to numerous places. There’s still so much she has in store for herself and those who follow along, and while I’m oh so proud of her, I’m also grateful to her for being such an inspiration to me (and the other Marzipans <3).
After middle school, I began developing social anxiety, and in freshman year of college, it reached its peak. Marzia has stated in her vlogs and blog posts that she also suffers from social anxiety, which really surprised me at first. Of course, as an online/public personality, there is only so much that a person does makes public, but upon her pointing out how nervous she is in her very first videos, I noticed it more.
On her blog, she recalled some memories of driving and stated how much she loved it. Since moving to the UK to live with her boyfriend, Felix, she was afraid to drive again as everything was reserved from how she learned. I’m afraid of driving like Marzia because the first time I went driving by myself, I nearly crashed and later popped both my right tires (going out alone was stupid though, I know). Due to not driving, both Marzia and I have missed opportunities and great memories. Knowing this, Marzia finally faced her fear, and accomplished driving again! Thinking about her and my own chance at freedom and peace, I decided this summer to face my fear as well. It helped to see that someone I admire so much had a similar fear but ultimately overcame it.
Another way Marzia has inspired me is to reach out to people, and while doing so, I ended up planning a reunion party with a bunch of friends from high school. I love planning parties, and for awhile I thought it was bad that I enjoy planning as much, or more than, the party itself, but in her recent video “Mini Midsummer,” she mentions her own love of party planning. I came to terms with my interests before the vlog, but hearing Marzia enjoy it too made me even more comfortable.
At the beginning of April, I went vegetarian (and am now vegan), and at the end of April, Marzia announced that she decided to become vegetarian too. On her blog and her channel, she now posts vegetarian and vegan recipes, and as someone experiencing veganism and experimenting with recipes as well, it almost felt like Marzia and I were in it together. It felt nice to again be supported for my choice, and ultimately being myself.
Like me, Marzia has a lot of interests, and committing to one has always been hard for her. I have known since a young age that I want to be a published author, but as I’ve grown, I have developed more interests and often drift away from them due to a fear that I’ll be distracted from my writing. In the past year, as I’ve watched Marzia grow, she’s really impacted my view on this… I know that I’ll always get nervous about other interests stealing me away from writing, but I don’t want it to stop me from learning and experiencing other interests and hobbies. Although Marzia is chastised for having multiple interests and not being a “professional” in one (see ‘committing’s link), she has honed her abilities and become incredibly talented. She is a creator, and she finds a way to balance her interests. She gives me the courage to pursue all my hobbies and dreams as well.
For awhile, I told myself, “I want to be like Marzia!”
But that has changed.
I’m not Marzia, and I never will be.
As I’m growing up and developing my own interests, I am becoming my own person. Marzia inspires me not to be like her, but to push myself and, above all, just be me.
Honestly, she has changed my life and helped me grow more confident, and if I could tell her anything, I would say two things:
- Thank you for all that you have encouraged me to do. It’s been a struggle to understand myself and pick a path, but you have been a kind and supportive public figure for me to look up to.
- You are an amazing person, and I wish you all the best in your current and future pursuits. Even in the times that you may doubt yourself, your Marzipans and I support you 100%, and just as you have been there for us, we are here for you, believing in you.
Thank you, Marzia!